Living with them.
I’m currently in my home town of Santa Barbara, taking some time away from the NYC hustle we all strive to get caught up in so we find the need to escape it. Like most of you, going home can be a run around of seeing the people you miss and love most, while catching your breath and slowing down the heart beat from the NYC bubble. I call this pseudo stress wrapped up in our first world problems….but still it’s a challenge. Feeling the self-induced guilt to spend quality time with the people you love most is sometimes heavier than the yearning to listen to your inner voice telling you to SLOW DOWN, but we all know it all comes down to priorities.
The word “priorities” has such a negative tone to it, maybe because it sounds rude to have to make those hard decisions as to who is first on the list by sharing your time between your own self care needs and people most important in your life. Sharing time, sharing energy and sharing yourself is what relationships and friendships are based on…. connecting. As each relationship or friendships is unique, the push and pull of taking and giving is dynamic, and maneuvering the dynamics with your own priorities is the real name of the game. There must be a balance between your own self-care and diving into making others your priority. It doesn't have to be all or nothing; it can be a simple readjusting of time and communication with all parties involved. I don’t think anyone would want their mate at half mast, not fully present in the moments of reconnecting. So maybe communicate your needs, your priorities and why they are necessary, AND then make plans with the people you love most. Not only will it give you something to look forward to, a goal to the resting and self-care but also tells your mate or friend that “you are on my list of priorities, I’m not forgetting or ignoring you” and I want to help you understand ME as I want to spend time with you to understand YOU. We all know reconnecting to people is just as important to the growth of you as reconnecting with yourself, so make them a priority too!